Guys night out has just been released on the website. The two call recorders failed during the aftershow, which is a real shame because it was lively . But later emails from all the guys helped piece together this transcript of the discussion.

Participants: Amin, Kyle, FaBio (Winter is Coming), Elio (Westeros), Apocalypse Dan [Chase had left earlier, before the aftershow].

Original question -> Which of the podcast members on the roster for the upcoming girls night out episode would you take to a desert island?

Original roster in front of us: Mimi, Ashley, Nancy, Sarah (missmollygrue), Christina, Jane, and Linda from Westeros.org

Two quick modifications were made. First, we changed the roster, with the guys showing a rare level of decency. Linda was taken off the roster, because Elio’s answer would have been too easy, plus FaBio immediately threatened to pick Linda, which would have made things really awkward/set off that Westeros-Winter is Coming war. Nancy was also removed from the roster because it would be weird to talk about a wife and mother of several children. Well, a real person anyway, it was fine to talk about fictitious ones in Martin’s world =P

The second modification was changing it to a "deserted" island, rather than "desert". The desert part was bringing up an image of an island without any food, prompting FaBio to thinking about taking whoever weighed the most, for cannibalistic purposes. Whereas the question in mind was really meant to be based on an island without a real threat of starvation, such as a tropical island, so this modification was made.

Discussion:

Everyone thought that Mimi would be a good choice. FaBio and Kyle revealed their crushes on her, which were pretty obvious already. However, Mimi's potential knife play scared people, particularly FaBio, who thought she might have many hidden knives. Kyle was worried about the lack of video games inevitably sending Mimi into a murderous rage.

Ashley was also a popular choice, but the potential fire play and other details that Mimi had unearthed on earlier podcasts still troubled us. Kyle was particularly worried that Ashley might make him role play as Sandor, burning his face while he was sleeping. That was the only thing stopping him from picking her.

Kyle argued for Jane, noting the merits of dating women in the military, based on his experience with his x-girlfriend. “mmm oh boy. They know what they want and are in damn good shape.”

Dan said his choice would be motivated by personality and common interests, because “the island sand would chafe too much.”

Final Choices:

FaBio: “I'll take Ashley and her piercings and just fake the Sandor cosplay.”

Dan: “I'd defintely want to be stranded with Sarah, she's got a lot of interests in common and I bet she could handle herself in a survival situation. Plus, even though Mimi is hawt and Asian it would onlyt take a day or two before she went all Lord of the Flies and used that knife to make me into Mongolian-style Flea Bottom bbq.”

Kyle: Jane, following his preference for women in the military mentioned above.

Elio: Christina or Mimi [his 1st choice was unclear]. “Christina [due to her history and archeology background] would be interesting to talk to (also potentially useful on Lost Island!).” Mimi “because Mongolians are hot.”

Amin: Mimi and Christina – I hosted this episode so I get to take two. Mimi is hot. Half Asians are hot by default. And they can both hold their own Westeros knowledge wise, allowing us to come up with our own version of the books without having the originals to refer to.

y'all are totally killing me.
i want to clarify two points: (1) i am not that hot. however, (2) i AM that prone to fits of violence.
furthermore, amin, you know christina and i would totally ignore you and i would be all up in her dig site.


yes, christina, i just compared your womanly parts to a large excavation of dirt.

The "hot, angry Asian" thing reminded me of the chinese mistress character in Clavell's Tai-Pan. I had to check wikipedia to remind me what her name was: Mai Mai.

You guys are all pigs. Way to perpetuate socially predetermined gender roles! Men are never going to be able to embrace their true identities as long as this kind of behavior keeps up!

















Doot doot

I once spent a week in the blistering white-sanded desert with nothing to eat but tuna fish and the blood of ravers and hippies. So as long as this desert(ed) island is well stocked in canned tuna and glowsticks, I'm set.

Missmolly, is this code for "I went to Burning Man once"?

Uh... thanks?

Mimi, don't worry. You have no idea how much humping happens on an excavation, and how easily archaeology lends itself to innuendo - there are many tools involved and trenches to be explored

How did this podcast turn into a "Wet, Hot Asian Babes!" ad? Is this a bad place to mention my double D bra size...?

I still haven't actually listened to the podcast, so I will post my reactions soon.

Yes. Other skills learned: How to build a bucky ball, how to speak jive, how to turn down drugs, how to drink water when you're not thirsty. All critical survival skills in the tropics, I hear.

So, Chase, I'm curious. Who would YOU take to a desert island, hmmmm? How convenient for you that you had to slip out before they started talking about this...

Is it too late to change my pick to Christina?

totally called this reaction. as soon as i read her post, i thought "and now here comes kyle with his breast obsession, foaming at the mouth."

I want to go to Burning Man so hard, but it's far away and I don't have any friends that would go.




Two podcasts scheduled at once. I was irrelevant on one, so I left for the other!

Because I know the extent of the situation in advance, evidenced by the fact that I'm able to choose something to take with me, I'd take whoever would be cool with roughing it alone, because I'd kill myself. The whole idea is that escape would be impossible and life a meaningless struggle (as if it weren't one already). It would be a painful existence until we finally succumb to exposure, hunger or thirst. Might as well end it before any of that became a problem.

Playing along: If I had to choose someone from the podcast? Probably Mimi, because I know her the best and I think she would be an entertaining companion through every end. That was not innuendo but feel free to interpret it as such.

If I could bring anyone? Eddie Vedder. Oh, yes.



I would also be remiss if I didn't point out the proper terminology for this thought experiment is deserted island. The whole point is that the island is deserted, devoid of other inhabitants and absent of all the conveniences we enjoy in everyday life. If the island were merely a desert it would open up a myriad of possibilities and alter the thought experiment to a great degree. This doesn't exclude the possibility that our deserted island would also be a desert, but it doesn't necessarily guarantee it either.

Well at least Mimi could you dig your grave with her knife. Glad it's not me

Only a few months in and you already know me so well Mimi. I'm sure your breasts are quite lovely as well.

Aw! He's such a gentleman!


Also, I think it was Apocalypse Dan on this podcast who said he got a link to another podcast from MissMollyGrue about fairy poetry and Tolkein and pronunciation of Middle English... could someone send me that link? It sounds really interesting.

It's incredible. The Tolkien series is amazing. the Middle English poetry and especially Faerie poetry courses are even better. Links below for site and podcast. Sarah's my literary hero

http://www.tolkienprofessor.com/
http://itunes.apple.com/podcast/the-tol ... d320513707

Cool! Something else to listen to while waiting for the next episode of this podcast.

Edit: after looking at the website, I am reminded of my own class I took at Chapel Hill with a Classics professor of mine. He was also my Greek teacher and it was he who taught me that Greek is actually a pretty cool language when you read Homer (up till then it had been boring grammar). He loved Tolkien so much that he taught a class designed so that he could get away with teaching him in classroom setting - a course called the Heroic Journey that also involved reading the Odyssey, the Aeneid, all of Lord of the Rings, and Sir Gawain and the Green Knight (translated by Tolkien). That was one of my favorite classes ever, and he was such a lovely teacher. Ah nostalgia! Sounds like this guy will bring back those memories.

Thanks again!

Yay! Corey Olsen is one of my favorite people. I almost flew to Baltimore this winter to attend his annual LoTR screening. It just costs too much.

In one of the one-on-one talks he does with a former student, he talks about Martin. In an admiring but this-is-nothing-like-Tolkien way. He also admits to a Harry Potter weakness somewhere in the Middle English faery course, when talking about classical faery story tropes.

In other news, I have decided that I would rather be on a desserted island.

Mmmm.... mountains made of mousse, pirouette palm trees, maybe a cappucino hot springs or something. Delicious!!

Nothing makes the humanities more cool than an exceptional teacher. My high school honors english teacher got me hooked on Shakespeare's snappy dialogue and witty repartee (I guess he was kind of the Tarantino of his day). I had a Greek & Roman mythology professor during my brief flirtation with college that sounds similar to your experience. We got to see what a dirty old man Ovid was, find so much of the humor in what would otherwise seem like dry, boring myths (I love the tale of Io, for instance). And Corey Olsen is just fabulous. You'll love it Christina.

I want to submit my formal protest that my very FIRST choice was not mentioned, which basically had to do with which ever young lady had the most meat on her bones. Since there was a good chance that on a desert, or deserted, but not a dessert island we may be forced to eat our comrades.

So that was choice A. Body mass wins. Now assuming we have ample food (dessert island!), then I'm clearly judging based on SEX TOY status.

Choice B. was Linda, because she's cool, and I wanted to irk Elio, but it was disallowed.

Choice C. was Ashley, because piercings show at least a slight willingness to accept pain. I'm talking someone who doesn't insist the handcuffs are fuzzy and pink. Because doesn't that defeat the purpose?

Mimi, while cute, is absolutely positively last on the list because she clearly has a penchant for dealing pain rather than accepting it. Dealbreaker!

Oh man Fabio I really wish my internet hadn't shut down on me during this part of the recording. I feel like you and I would have agreed on quite a few things.

1.) Handcuffs being pink and fuzzy? Thumbs down.

2.) Ashley's piercings? Thumbs up.

3.) Common American male thinking that all Asian women are submissive sex toys? Thumbs up and down. (see below)

A.) Submissive sex toys? Thumbs up.
B.) All Asian women are submissive sex toys? Thumbs down. Mimi was raised in Texas. This stereotype does not apply. (insert random taken in the rear joke here)

Pigs.

Volcano erupts on my dessert island.


You are jealous of me because I am eating this RIGHT NOW.

Mmmm I'm not usually a fan of strawberry shortcake, do to the inevitable sogginess, but I must say that looks delicious.

Greatest.
Post.
Ever.

Kyle forever bad ass.

yeah this whole thread is magnificent