Mar 20, 2009
Episode 22: Everyone’s A Targaryen
Episode 22 for the week of March 22nd, in which we embark on a new show structure, focusing on three main components: one chapter, one character, and one theory. Β This week, we kick off with chapter 46 of A Game of Thrones, discuss Doran Martell’s gout, and conclude that the “Varys is a Faceless Man” theory is entirely inconclusive.
We hope you like our new format- we changed it in light of some very good feedback in our email and comments. Β Let us know what you think, and drop us an email if you’d like to guest host for an episode.
46 Comments, Comment or Ping
Daniel W
OMG Two episodes!!!1 Downloading now!!
Mar 21st, 2009
koinosuke
fuckin’ sweet, two eps at once! excitement to the max once i regain consciousness.
Mar 21st, 2009
Brianna
I love both episodes
I too am not a fan of everyone is a Targaryen theory.
The king and queen should have had an open relationship.
Chase she did not try to make it work at all!
They were nine at the time
Doran is awsome. But it was never his POV.
I heard a door creek
That might be the most crazy theory ever.
Mar 21st, 2009
Chase
I forget which chapter, but I’m pretty sure she did say that she tried to go into the marriage with an open mind. How long she kept her mind open I can’t say though.
Mar 22nd, 2009
Mme. Crevette
I personally like the Varys is a Targ theory, because it’s cool to see a Targ (if he is one…) doing something other than ruling/asking other people for advice/being totally incompetent.
Mar 21st, 2009
mimi
gotta admit, i do agree with this.
Mar 21st, 2009
Chase
Here’s the theory, by the way.
http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?showtopic=34362
Mar 21st, 2009
DTM
My first thought on listening to this episode: Holy Shit it’s Amin. It’s been a while since he’s done an episode. Maybe Chris will eventually come back too (and to a lessor extent Aaron).
My second thought is on Doran. IMO, the only reason he could even be considered a badass is due to Dany being a badass. Face it, if Dany never brought back the dragons and became a realistic threat for the Iron Throne, then all of Doran’s scheming and planning would have accomplished jackshit. Imagine if things went according to plan and Doran married off his daughter and backed Viserys’ claim to the throne. I’m sure that would have worked out really well. /sarcasm
Mar 21st, 2009
Chase
That’s my part of my bit with Doran Martell. I think he’s the most potentially dangerous because of his intellect, the scale of his plans and more importantly his patience for the long-term solution. Whether or not his plans can actually succeed is another thing. Dany could just murder Quentin on the spot, since she has no reason to trust anyone from Westeros.
Were it not for Dany’s dragons, though, I think he would come up with something else. Viserys is irrelevant, because he could arrange an “accident” and place Dany in the foreground.
Mar 22nd, 2009
Split
Wheels Martell as dangerous as Little Finger? No way. Aside from the fact that he’s resting all his hopes on Quentyn, he moves too slow to make any kind of waves in Westeros. The game is played bloody, but also quickly compared to Wheels and his plans.
Mar 30th, 2009
DTM
Wanted to add: I’m not saying that Doran isn’t a player but let’s face it, he fell ass backwards into the ultimate trump card, Dany’s Dragons (assuming that Quentyn doesn’t fuck it up). If it wasn’t for that, Doran would be scheming and puttering around until his gout exploded like a ripe melon… er whatever.
Mar 21st, 2009
John
Some discussion on the Faceless Man (FM) theory:
Firstly, even though I was the one who brought this theory to your attention, I should start off by saying that I don’t agree with the theory at all. There is just no way GRRM would go for something like this – it is just too far-fetched and fanciful.
Having said that, the theory does have its merits. For example, it explains why the FM helped Euron secure the throne by killing Balon – they want to use Euron and his horn to take control of the dragons and bring down the Wall. I also quite like the idea that the FM killed their original masters (the Valyrians) and were involved in the Doom of Valyria.
But, IMO, the theory falls down badly when it asserts that Varys has stolen Qyburn’s identity (you didn’t really discuss this point in the podcast but anyway…). The problem here is that Qyburn has shown few signs of a personality change since Varys left King’s Landing. For example, Qyburn continues to show quite a penchant for necromancy and re-animating corpses – a characteristic not shared by Varys. In my view, the theory would be more cogent if it assumed that Varys had simply fled KL in ASOS.
BTW Brianna, if you think the “Varys is a FM” theory is the craziest one out there about Varys – you are sadly mistaken π
Have a read of this: http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php?showtopic=28634
IMO, this one really takes the cake. It would also probably be a fun theory to discsuss in the podcast – if only for a bit of comic relief…and it’s shorter than the last theory as well π
Mar 21st, 2009
John
Also, I forgot to add: I thought it was a bit strange that you guys didn’t discuss the ADWD update! Does anyone really think that George will get it published by September or October?
Mar 21st, 2009
mimi
actually, we discussed his day of a billion blog updates on a previous mini-episode that hasn’t been edited yet. there is some pessimism on our end- i can’t put any faith in speculative deadlines, there’s too much heartbreak on the line. what about you?
Mar 21st, 2009
Brianna
wow that theoy does take the cake! wow.
I’m surprised they didn’t talk about the piolt script.
I think mimi thinks I’m uber fangirl over her… which I am.
Mar 22nd, 2009
John
Chase did allude to the pilot script during one of the podcasts, but he didn’t go into it in any detail. Maybe the pod will talk about it in a dedicated episode so that listeners who don’t want to be spoiled can just avoid that ep altogether.
And I’m glad you liked the theory π
It really is a classic.
Mar 22nd, 2009
Brianna
You might might be right or maybe they already did and it was never put out.
Mar 22nd, 2009
Chase
We (Mimi and me) came to the conclusion that it is far too late to devote an episode to the script discussion. There were some other issues that caused pause with some of the other members as well.
Mar 22nd, 2009
Chase
I don’t mean to drop 20 posts in these two entries, but I just read that Merling theory. The best part about it is that he’s probably serious.
Mar 22nd, 2009
John
Nightflyer (the author of the merling theory) is infamous on the Westeros forums for his crackpot theories. If you read the entire thread, you would have seen that Mormont (one of the board moderators) ended up closing the thread for “intellectual wankery” on the part of Nightflyer. You can never really tell whether Nightflyer takes his theories seriously, but obviously Mormont believes that s/he just invents them for shits and giggles.
All of this discussion aside, the fact remains that Nightflyer’s theories are a lot of fun π
Mar 22nd, 2009
jude
I don’t mean to be a big doofus, but why doesn’t this link work? Am I missing something….
Apr 12th, 2009
John
As ever, I am skeptical about George’s anticipated release dates. Especially when it seems that he is still having so much trouble completing individual chapters. I mean, just the other day he posted this on Not a Blog:
“Me, I’m going back to DANCE. Maybe I can even finish that bloody Tyrion chapter today…”
I reckon that if he really was 6 months away from publishing, he would be at the editing stage by now and not still finishing chapters.
Anyway, hopefully the gap between ADWD and TWOW will be more tolerable than the AFFC/ADWD gap. For starters, the ASOIAF World Book is due to for publication during that period. And we might also have the HBO series by then…
Mar 21st, 2009
Scilens
Harry Potter is a children’s book
I’ll love you for saying that forever <3
it needs to be said more often
Mar 23rd, 2009
DTM
Say what you will about Harry Potter but releasing 7 books in 10 years, not having a drop in quality, ending on a satisfying conclusion, and doing that in the face of enormous pressure. JKR executed her series about as well as humanly possible. I’d consider it fortunate if GRRM can finish off ASOIAF in a timely and satisfying manner.
Mar 23rd, 2009
Scilens
“not having a drop in quality”? “satisfying conclusion”? I’ve heard people say otherwise xD oh, well… it’s a matter of opinion. I don’t like Harry Potter, but it’s okay if people do.
I still think it’s a children’s book :]
Mar 28th, 2009
koinosuke
Much agreement. Yes, Harry is aimed mainly at kids and young adults, but I still love them and JK Rowling pretty much rocked socks at both writing them well and publishing them in a timely manner.
Mar 28th, 2009
Scilens
That’s what we Martin fans all crave, eh? publishing in a timely manner… *sigh*
Apr 3rd, 2009
Ray
What about the “Varys is a Merling” theory. You should discuss that one next.
Mar 23rd, 2009
Aaron
SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE
KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLS
DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUMBLEDORE
Mar 28th, 2009
Anonymous
Didn’t you guys mention something in your facebook group about a mini-episode concerning other fantasy books?
When is it due?
Mar 29th, 2009
Amy
Daang. No more Chris? Still..he hasn’t been there for a good few episodes and it’s still been awesome. Obviously that’ll continue ;D
Haven’t finished listening to this one yet. (Just thought the change in line-up deserved some acknowledgment.) Ep 21 gets the usual thumbs up!
Apr 2nd, 2009
John
Woah, wait a minute, Chris is really gone? The podcast line-up looks really strange now without Robin of Loxley leading his band of merry men (and women) π
Any chance of him returning as a guest host in the future?
Apr 5th, 2009
Scilens
I’m sure they’ll let him join again if he ever turns up again. maybe. I hope.
Apr 7th, 2009
mimi
yeah, it wasn’t a negative split.
chris just ignored the podcast’s existence for a few months and we took the hint that he’s not interested in being a part of it anymore.
i’m sure one day if he remembers how to hit “reply” to any emails from us, we’ll be back in business with all eight hosts.
Apr 8th, 2009
oxmix
The podcast should run a contest to propose a house name that would be the female equivelant to Manwoody.
Apr 8th, 2009
John
No need. I think House Camel Toe would win at a gallop π
Apr 8th, 2009
Brian
Can I design the sigil ?
Apr 10th, 2009
John
Well, I suppose this would be the ready-made sigil:
http://georgerrmartin.com/gallery/crows07.html
but if you want to design your own, that’s fine with me π
BTW guys, I remember the pod (and especially mimi) being a bit upset in the cover art episode when there was no Japanese art for AFFC. Well, it’s been posted now, and it’s pretty awesome (although Jaime kind of looks like Gregor which is a bit scary):
http://georgerrmartin.com/gallery/crows21a.html
http://georgerrmartin.com/gallery/crows21b.html
Apr 10th, 2009
oxmix
House Camel Toe is pretty good. Now how about a first name for someone from House Camel Toe to be betrothed to Dickon Manwoody?
Apr 10th, 2009
John
Cersei Camel Toe has a ring to it. But it’s not very original.
Apr 10th, 2009
oxmix
How about Virginia Camel Toe?
Apr 13th, 2009
Brian
House cameltoe words ” Never shall we split hairs”
Apr 13th, 2009
oxmix
How about “Front and Center”?
Apr 13th, 2009
John
Some other suggestions:
– “Though All Men Do Desire Us”
– “Unappealing, Unclean, Unappetising”
– “Hear me Whore!”
Apr 13th, 2009
Chase
– The Road Warrior
He me roar, indeed.
Apr 13th, 2009
jude
“more importantly, do you think Quentyn will be hot?”
Well done, mimi.
this episode was great, and i’m loving the new format! can’t wait to start listening to the new one tomorrow. oh, and it was great to hear Amin again…and he didn’t leave early this time!
Apr 28th, 2009
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